Rwanda Bill Definitely In Best Interest Of Refugees Who Meant To Go To Rwanda Anyway

MPs who voted in favour of the Rwanda Bill claimed to be satisfied that it really is in the best interest of those refugees who meant to go to Rwanda anyway. “I’m positive that at least one of them’s seen Gorillas in the Mist and has had Rwanda on their bucket list since then,” commented Peter Aldous, who voted in favour of the bill.

The Bill forcibly displaces asylum-seekers to Rwanda, despite the Supreme Court’s judgement that asylum seekers risk persecution there, and despite the fact that 99.99% of the asylum-seekers don’t want to go. “But the bill undoubtedly has refugees’ best interests at heart — at least the other 00.01% of them who were actually on their way to Rwanda anyway and accidentally ended up in the UK,”  insisted Duncan Baker, the MP for North Norfolk. “Got lost or something,” he said.

At press time, even Labour MPs conceded to the trivially true claim.